Friday ramblings

It’s been about 4 months since I started this blog.  I am still getting used to the whole thing, so bear with me.

I am not very witty.  Usually it comes when I am not even thinking about it.  This becomes a problem for me, because I think ALL THE TIME.  My brain doesn’t seem to ever shut down.  I’ve become very good at shutting it down in order to sleep, but the exact thought that was in my mind before I fell asleep, reappears first thing in the morning.

I actually have a very weird mind.  It’s both complex and simple at the same time.  Does that make sense?  I am intelligent.  I lack some form of common sense.  I am not sure really how to explain it.  I remember some of the strangest things.  Yet you ask me what I did the other day, I’d have to think about it for quite a few minutes before remembering.  I remember some of the strangest memories from my past, and sometimes can’t remember at all what happened yesterday.  I am horrible at small talk.  I may ask you a question, and then five or ten minutes later ask you the same question.  Not remembering that I’d already asked it.  I do believe that little quality annoys most people.  Yet, I can remember something someone said to me years ago like it just happened.

I love learning.  I have no problem remembering things I learned in class, or anything I’ve researched.  But, I seem to only absorb the things that really interest me.  History was never one of those things.  Hence, lacking knowledge in the historical department.  Politics was never one either, and don’t anticipate it becoming one anytime soon.  Sports was another.  This is pretty common among many people, the difference being, other people may actually understand it and comprehend it, whereas I can’t.

Logic and organization are a key feature to how my brain works.  I am always thinking logically, dissecting things and trying to figure them out.  Simple things can often leave me stumped.  So, I find ways to dissect those as well, until I figure them out.

These things are the reason I have found peace in horseback riding.  Although I am very good at doing many things while thinking about something else completely, when riding, I am forced to concentrate on the task and am unable to think about other things.  This was new for me, because usually, no matter what I was doing, there were still a million and one thoughts running through my mind.  I imagine in many years, when it comes more naturally to me, I will be back to the days of a racing mind.  So, for now, this is what grounds me.

I’ve learned SO many other things from horseback riding as well.  Patience, for one.  While I am still not the most patient person, there is quite an improvement.  I have a very compulsive nature, and I am a perfectionist.  Training a horse can’t be planned ahead of time.  You can’t expect to accomplish any one thing on a given day.  It’s really a day by day process.  There have been plenty of breakdowns and times I was ready to give up, but I didn’t.  And I am better for it.

Derek is the best one to put my mind at ease.  He knows how it works, and knows how to challenge it, or relax it.  He is the one that is good at remembering little details.  And many of the things I do remember are because of him. 

Anyway, I don’t know where this went.  I honestly don’t even remember why I started this.  SEE?!?  I stumbled across the story I started to write about our trip over the holidays and had completely forgotten about it!  I am going to try to finish it this weekend and post it.  Have a great weekend!


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Meg
    Mar 07, 2008 @ 13:37:01

    Oh Steph, I know what you mean. Glad you found someone who balances you out so perfectly.


  2. debkolar
    Mar 07, 2008 @ 15:09:55

    We all have some quirkiness, makes us all the more interesting. This may not be directly related, but it comes to mind:Sometimes what we consider our shortcomings just need to be examined from a different direction to see that they are also blessings, advantages, assets. You many not think you are witty, but you have a unique perspective that is appreciated in its own right. And you will especially admire other’s wittiness. Glad you found an activity to be absorbed in, to quiet your mind, we all need that. And it makes me so happy that you have found your soulmate.


  3. Annemarie
    Mar 18, 2008 @ 17:17:59

    Oh, that’s awesome! I completely agree how great it is to find that soulmate. It’s just so easy. I’d never stressed this little about a relationship before.


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